Lately, I am increasingly annoyed with people assuming that a lack of an answer means a “no” when they are invited to do something. Well, it isn’t! A lack of an answer means (surprise!) a lack of an answer. I’d much rather hear a “no, I won’t come to your lousy party even if you served the last drink on earth” than a silenced cop-out. At least I know where I stand.

People are embarrassed/shy/uncomfortable saying “no” in general, for some odd reason. Delaying a “no”, or not giving it at all, hoping that everything will just magically go away — like kids closing their eyes assuming no one can see them anymore — is disrespectful for the other person’s time and effort. Yes, I believe that saying “no” is a sign of respect only second to a “yes”, of course (unless it is a “courtesy invite”, but that’s another matter), while non-answer is, you guessed it, insulting.

I don’t require a reason. I don’t care. Why do people feel obliged to give an, often made-up and unimaginative, excuse to weasel out of something they don’t want to do? I long for the day where I can comfortably say “Nah, don’t feel like it” (those who know me already know that I often do it anyway, but it is socially unaccepted and considered impolite, especially around relative strangers, and I end up looking like a weirdo).

So, for those of you that interact with me… say “no” without the excuse and I promise to never-ever-ever-ever be insulted or ask why. But for goodness sake, do it quick.

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