now, here is stupidity I support
This CNN article tells us of infants barred from flights because their names are similar to ones on the infamous no-fly black list. Some lucky travelers got a quiet flight home. I suffer from crying babies and ever laughing kids on flights. Even worse, I dislike the parents who think that their kids’ new goo-goo-ga-ga trick is something that everybody else cares about and should be broadcast to the whole plane. Parents have this habit of thinking that their kids are also the center of everybody else’s universe and that everything they do should be tolerated. No, don’t smarten or educate your kid on my expense while I’m confined to a metal tube. Use every means necessary to shut them up. And yes, I couldn’t care less. It’s not cute when it bothers sleep or reading. There’s a reason why Cognac comes in small bottles on flights.
I want to revolutionize the travel industry by separating parents with kids with the rest of the population by having special, kid-centric, flights. Kids will then not be allowed on the other kind that will be called “quite flight guaranteed class” (this system would then be applied to trains and buses as well.) I mean, they have special needs. The seatings will all be bulk head, business class will have a play area and first class will have a nanny for every toddler while the parents take goo-goo-ga-ga classes and try to remember the times when they did not have babies.
I’m being a bit extreme, but one of the things I can not tolerate is people who are oblivious to their surroundings. In a plane, this is doubly worse because there is nothing to be done, I simply can not grudgingly walk away. And yes, I know this view will likely change when and if I have kids. I will always have this post to remind me how I was before :)
August 16th, 2005 at 7:36 pm
Sounds like you had a rough day.
There are parents and then there are parents - this is often where the problem lies - not banishing all children.
My children are frequent fliers, my son’s first flight at 4 months transatlantic then transpacific at age 9 months and continually since. The usual reaction we get from fellow passengers is astonishment as to how quiet and well behaved they are. Part of this comes from our sensitivity to others’ peace and respect. We travel with them because we expect them to learn how to travel, just as we also take them to nice (but appropriate) restaurants where we expect them to behave. If we never took them out ‘in public’ how would they have ever learned to act?
I know of the types of encounters you are speaking - but notice it is often the parents that are oblivious to their children’s actions. Some of the other nightmare experiences I have had in flights involve adults in various forms: those with incredibly bad odors; those who speak exceptionally loud and tirelessly; those adjacent and magnificiently obese threatening near asphyxiation; those pushing and shoving and spilling and… you get it… In this horrible little world you need to have a lot of specialized compartments.
One trick we came up with was a moratorium on airline travel when one child was between the ages of one and two years. Before one year of age - they sleep like babies in the airline provided bassinets. But then around one year of age they learn to walk and can’t be strapped down until they are old enough to reason with - often around the age of two. We simply saw this coming and did not need to put anyone through the discomfort.
Yes, we have had the misfortune to have a child in pain during a flight resulting in too much crying - for this we beg your indulgence and forgiveness (as much as you would expect us to indulge you were you in such straits during a flight).
The thing about raising children is that it is not just for the parents benefit, but for the benefit of the rest of society, to this end you too are invested even if you are not so inclined.
One quick (?) anecdote (for your laughter or horror)
We had boarded a flight in Detroit and were all required to stay buckled in our seats at the gate for over an hour waiting to get a spot in the queue to take-off. My son eventually said he needed to go to the bathroom just as the aircraft pushed back and started to taxi. I mentioned this to the flight attendant who called the captain. He then had to pull out of line and wait while my son ‘did his thing’. I thought the passengers wanted to kill us. I kept asking him, ’son, are you done yet?’ He would answer back, quite loudly, ‘not yet, these things take time’… Some people found this amusing. This ‘flight’ took us almost two hours - although it really requires about 30 minutes of time in the air. Of course this could have been anyone - if it were you, you would welcome the grace others showed.
Obviously this wasn’t El Al ;)
August 22nd, 2005 at 1:33 pm
I’d feel your pain, except that we’re blessed with a perfect child who never misbehaves on flights. And if he does, he’s so cute that no-one minds… hahaha Luckily for us, most people on the planes have been very nice about playing with Micah and trying to help us keep him entertained, and we’re too busy bouncing him up and down and shining the little light into his eyes to notice other peoples’ glares. For what it’s worth, I do think the airlines should offer no-kids flights — for a slightly higher price and on a first-come-first-served basis.
Remember — putting up with annoying people/babies/coworkers builds good character!!! ;) Plus, it helps maintain cosmic balance, for all the times you (the generic you) yourself have been annoying.
Have fun in Cambridge!! We’ll try to come visit, and then *you’ll* be the cause of us inflicting Micah on trapped trans-Atlantic flyers!! ;)